Schaffer's

Duties of the Bridal Party

BEST MAN OR HONOR ATTENDANT (FEMALE): 
The best man should be someone who is very close to the groom and able to give him assistance and emotional support. He should assist with arranging transportation for the wedding party, making hotel arrangements for out-of-town guests, and coordinating measurements and rentals with the groomsmen. He is responsible for planning the bachelor party. Before the ceremony the best man should help the groom coordinate the ushers and groomsmen. During the ceremony the best man carries the bride’s ring and gives it to the groom, holds the clergy’s fee, and drives for or rides with the bride, groom, and maid of honor from the ceremony to the reception. At the reception, the best man offers the first toast. After the ceremony, he is responsible for returning the groomsmen’s and usher’s rented clothing. The best man is a legal witness of the marriage and signs the marriage certificate, so he must be at least 18.

GROOMSMEN: 
Groomsmen should assist the groom and best man with whatever they need in the months and weeks leading up to the wedding. Most importantly, they should be fitted for a tuxedo and secure the rental as early as possible. The groomsmen should help the best man to prepare for the bachelor party, and be present at the wedding rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. During the ceremony, groomsmen will usually escort the bridesmaids down the aisle, and escort them out at the end of the ceremony.

USHERS: 
Ushers should arrive at the wedding site at least one hour before the ceremony and help guests to their seats, seating guests of the bride on the left and guests of the groom on the right. The ushers also escort the bride’s mother and groom’s parents down the aisle at the beginning of the ceremony. For a smaller wedding, a few groomsmen can perform these duties in place of ushers.

RING BEARER: 
The ring bearer walks down the aisle before either the flower girl or bride and carries a pillow with symbolic rings on it. The actual bride’s ring should be kept with the best man, and the actual groom’s ring should be kept with the maid of honor. An appropriate ring bearer should be 3-10 years old.

FATHER OF THE BRIDE: 
The father of the bride escorts his daughter down the aisle and stands next to the mother of the bride in the receiving line. The father dances with his daughter after the bride and groom’s first dance, and either both parents of the bride or just the father should toast the couple at the rehearsal dinner.

FATHER OF THE GROOM: 
The groom’s parents traditionally host the rehearsal dinner, and pay for the alcohol and bar service at the reception.

Choosing gifts for your groomsmen

Choosing gifts for your groomsmen can often be a difficult task for many grooms. Not knowing what is appropriate and the simple matter of shopping for gifts for his close friends often causes a little nervousness on the grooms behalf. Relax, think of this as the perfect opportunity to show your close friends how much you appreciate their friendship as well as the time and money they’ve invested into being part of your wedding. Most importantly, choose a gift that your groomsmen will cherish and enjoy, not just because it is traditional. Groomsmen’s gifts often are more practical and less ornamental, but get the gifts that fit your groomsmen.

One of the most traditional groomsmen gifts is a flask. Available in a wide array of finishes and sizes, a flask can be both a traditional souvenir as well as a practical gift. As with all of these gift ideas, don’t skimp on quality when it comes to choosing the flask. Set your budget and then choose the best available gift that fits within it.

Some other common groomsmen gifts include:

• Bracelts

• Watches (Wrist or Pocket)

• Cuff Links or Tie Clips

• Money Clips

• Cigar Sets or Humidors

• Men’s Fragrance

• Multi Tool

• Pen Set

• Bar Set, Stein or Mug

To add a personal touch to any of these items, consider a personalized engraved or embroidered message. This could be something specific to each groomsman, the date of the wedding, or their name or initials. Groomsmen’s gifts are generally presented at the rehearsal dinner. This gives you the chance to make a more formal presentation, perhaps accompanied by a toast or short stories about your relationship with the individual groomsmen.

How to give a wedding toast

It is quite an honor to be a part of someone’s wedding, but you may still get butterflies at the thought of addressing a room full of people. Take a deep breath, and keep the following things in mind while crafting the perfect toast for their special day.

START EARLY: 
You’ve probably heard this from every English teacher in your life. Begin writing your toast early and keep re-writing until you’ve reached perfection. You may want to begin by writing down everything you can think of, and then remove things until you’re happy with the result. Finally, ask someone you trust to give you their honest opinion and edit your speech.

STAY ON TOPIC: 
Everyone in the room is there for one reason: to be with the bride and groom on their special day. You may have some great stories about your buddies in college, but try to stay focused on the new couple. Also, keep in mind who the audience is. If you’re addressing a room full of mature individuals, it would be wise to avoid vulgarity and jokes that many people won’t understand.

KNOW YOUR STYLE: 
Many of the best toasts are sweet, funny, or both. The type of speech you give should depend on your personality and relationship with the couple. You should begin by stating who you are and what your relationship is to the bride or groom. You might be able to talk about how they met, romantic re-tellings of important moments in their lives, or mention specific things about their personalities that make them great for each other. You don’t need to try too hard. Use your history and relationship with the couple as your guide. For the bride and groom giving a toast, focus on each other and what makes your relationship special.

KEEP IT SHORT: 
A good toast should be only as long as it needs to be. Anything longer than a few minutes is usually over-doing it. Practicing before-hand will help you get a good idea of length, which brings us to the next point…

PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT: 
When your toast is written and refined, practice out loud in front of a mirror or other people until you know it by heart. It is okay to have notes with you as you give the toast, but you shouldn’t use them as a crutch. Plenty of practice will settle your stomach on the big day, and you’ll give a better performance.

WRAP IT UP: 
Toasts are usually ended by raising your glass and congratulating the bride and groom. Be sure to take a small drink from your glass as you end the toast. Silently congratulate yourself on a job well done.

Choosing gifts for the Bride and Groom from the Wedding Party

Although the Bride and Groom more than likely have registered for gifts, it isn’t uncommon for members of the bridal party to buy a gift not on the registry. Generally it is more personalized or a little more elaborate than a set of dishes or a picture frame. Don’t feel limited to buying a gift just for the Groom if your a Groomsmen or likewise for Bridesmaids. It might be easier or more appropriate to buy a gift for the couple.

If you want to go over the top, you might consider combining your resources with the other groomsmen or bridesmaids or among the whole party and getting something even more elaborate.

There are no real rules on what to get, so be thoughtful with your choice and make it memorable.